Why Your Babies Temperament Holds the Key to Better Sleep
At Whispers Sleep Co, we believe sleep support isn’t just about routines—it’s about relationships. Every baby is born with a unique temperament, and when we take the time to understand it, everything from bedtime to bonding becomes a little easier.
If your baby’s sleep feels unpredictable, or if typical advice hasn’t worked, it might be time to take a step back and look at who your baby is—not just what they’re doing. Let’s talk about temperament, how it impacts sleep, and how you can start working with your baby’s natural tendencies, instead of against them.
What is Temperament?
Temperament is your baby’s natural way of experiencing and responding to the world around them. It includes things like mood, energy levels, how easily they adapt to change, how intensely they react, and how sensitive they are to stimuli. It’s not shaped by parenting or environment—it’s innate, and often noticeable from birth.
You may have already observed how your baby: Startles easily or loves being held tightly, Struggles with transitions or adapts quickly, Cries with intensity or simply fusses, Thrives on routine or seems unpredictable… All of this is temperament at work.
The Science Behind It
The study of temperament goes back as far as ancient Greece, but a huge turning point came in the 1950s with the work of psychiatrists Stella Chess and Alexander Thomas. In their famous study, they observed children over many years and discovered that while each child was unique, their behaviors tended to follow certain patterns.
They identified Three broad temperament types:
Easy-going
Slow to warm up
Spirited (also referred to as "high needs," "orchid children," or "highly sensitive")
Nine traits that describe a child’s behavioral style:
Adaptability – how easily they adjust to change
Persistence – how determined they are
Mood – general emotional tone
Intensity – strength of emotional reactions
Activity level – how energetic they are
Regularity – predictability of biological functions
Distractibility – how easily they are sidetracked
Approach/withdrawal – how they respond to new things
Sensitivity – how tuned in they are to sensory input
Each child falls somewhere on the spectrum for each of these traits. Understanding where your baby sits on each trait can help you make more informed choices about how to soothe, feed, and support them—especially when it comes to sleep.
How Temperament Impacts Baby Sleep
Temperament can dramatically influence how a baby sleeps, and it’s often why some babies settle easily while others seem to resist every nap or bedtime.
How does this look for your little ones sleep?
High Regularity:
These babies often nap and wake at the same times every day. They thrive on structured routines and consistent wake windows.
Low Regularity:
These babies are more unpredictable. Trying to force a strict schedule may result in stress. A flexible, responsive approach is best here.
High Activity Level:
These little ones need to move! They benefit from plenty of physical activity during the day and may enjoy rough-and-tumble or vestibular input (rocking, bouncing) as part of their bedtime routine.
High Sensitivity:
These babies might react strongly to scratchy pajamas, changes in light or noise, or even the smell of a lotion. They may need extra time to wind down, and a sleep space that’s calm, consistent, and just right for their senses.
High Intensity or Persistence:
If these babies are upset, they’re really upset. They don’t just fuss—they cry with passion. And if something doesn’t work for them, they’ll let you know—loudly and persistently. Sleep training methods that involve leaving them to cry often backfire here.
Could Your Baby Be Highly Sensitive?
Roughly 20% of people are thought to be “highly sensitive.” These individuals tend to feel everything more deeply—from sensory input to emotional shifts in the room. It’s not a flaw—it’s a trait. In babies and toddlers, high sensitivity might look like:
Overstimulation in busy or loud environments
Intense crying in response to small discomforts
Deep empathy (getting upset when others are upset)
Difficulty with transitions or unpredictability
Needing very specific sleep conditions to settle
These babies often need more support falling asleep or more control over their environment. They may also need more sleep than their peers, or sometimes, less—depending on how their nervous system processes stimulation.
How to Support Your Child’s Temperament
When you understand your baby’s temperament, you can adapt your environment, routines, and expectations to support them more gently and effectively.
Here are a few ways to work with your baby’s natural style:
- Choose sleepwear that is soft and tag-free for sensory-sensitive babies
- Avoid stimulating activities close to bedtime—unless your baby thrives on that sensory input
- Try a longer wind-down routine for babies who take time to settle
- Offer movement (like rocking or bouncing) for babies who crave vestibular input
- Tune into cues—your baby may be showing you what they need
- Let go of comparison, your baby may not fit the typical “sleep norms” and that’s okay
The Power of “Goodness of Fit”
In temperament research, there’s a beautiful concept called “goodness of fit.” It’s not about changing your baby—it’s about learning to parent the baby you have.
Goodness of fit describes how well a child’s temperament matches their environment and the responses they receive from caregivers. Understanding and working alongside your baby builds greater connection and allows you to be more intune with their needs.
This doesn’t mean you have to get it right every time. It just means you’re attuned. You’re observing. You’re adjusting. That’s what responsive parenting looks like—and it makes all the difference, especially in sleep.
Wanting to learn more?
Whispers Sleep Co. is here to help you tune in to your baby’s unique rhythm, build trust-based routines, and create sleep support that feels good for the whole family.
Ready to get started? Join our newsletter or book a free 15-minute clarity call to chat about your baby’s sleep and temperament journey. Or explore our packages to see what might be the best fit for you and your family.
